My grandmother, Norma Richey Bayes, was my first best friend, mentor, and my rock – Santa Barbara Fiduciary is what I sometimes refer to as her ‘parting gift’ to me.
My grandmother was my inspiration throughout life. She carried herself with dignity, strength, and class. She moved through social circles with commanding power, grace, and elegance. Though she might not have been an easy person to please, there was not a better feeling in the world that earning her love and respect.
As she told the story, I was eight days old when we first met. This day started one of the truest and deepest relationships of my life. Hardly a week of my childhood went by when she wasn’t near. As time and circumstance pulled my family further apart, my grandmother and I remained very close.
After my granddad passed away, I decided I would attend UC Santa Barbara to remain close to her. During this time I found out that she had been diagnosed with blood cancer and regularly helped her with shopping, errands, and general tidying up. I fondly remember enjoying ‘Sundowner Specials’ at The Beachside with her on Thursday nights.
After graduating UC Santa Barbara, I moved up to San Francisco to pursue my career. The distance between my grandmother and myself concerned me as I began to realize the extent of her dependence on my assistance. At first, I noticed her increasing confusion during our phone calls. On one of these calls, she referenced an unusually high outstanding utility bill and threats that it would be turned off. Concern soon escalated to frustration when, without something called a ‘power of attorney,’ the utility company refused to tell me how much she owed them. During one weekend visit, I was shocked to find rotting food in the refrigerator. And I was heartbroken to see the notes she was leaving around the house for my grandfather, who had been gone almost ten years. Making matters worse was her adamant refusal for the caregivers I tried to engage once I attained power of attorney. I moved back to Santa Barbara to fulfill an unspoken promise: that I would be there for her in the end. My grandmother passed away in my arms in May of 2008.
The unspoken bond I had with my grandmother became a serious commitment and challenging passage into the unknown. Those challenges, perhaps still the greatest that I have ever faced, became the foundation for Santa Barbara Fiduciary. My company is now one of my greatest achievements, another gift my grandmother gave me: her parting gift to me.
At Santa Barbara Fiduciary, we work to honor and uphold the legacies of our clients. It’s my personal mission to know that, if there is a heaven, and she ever looks down on me, she would continue to love, respect, and be proud of me.